It’s not news that wedding planning in a pandemic is tricky.  It feels like being in a weird virtual wedding waiting room, where people keep coming in, but no one ever leaves. Most couples have had to review their wedding plans in some way. If you’ve postponed your wedding already, you know all about the joys of rescheduling. If you’re newly engaged, you may find it difficult to know where to start.

What can I say to help, as we wait for normality to return, sitting socially distanced, on our sanitised chairs, with the fragrance of alcohol gel filling the air …

I’d like to offer you my home-grown planning tool, to help you prioritise your wedding and make some contingency plans.

Contingency plans for peace of mind

Whatever your situation, being crystal clear on your priorities will help you. The results will either confirm what you know, or give you some new insights. They will give you more peace of mind and a greater sense of control. I think we all need plenty of those right now!

What are your wedding Must-Haves?

When planning a ceremony, a speech, or any event in my life, I class everything as one of these:

• Must Have (something I can’t/won’t budge on)
• Nice to Have (I really love this)
• Could Have, or Not (I could limit/ditch this)

For example, having your complete wedding guest list could be your must-have. You’d rather postpone the wedding than uninvite people. Alternatively, maybe the date is your must-have. You want to marry asap, or on a certain date, even if it means fewer guests. Maybe the venue is your must-have. It’s your dream venue, which works brilliantly for your guests too. Maybe you don’t know what your must-haves are yet. Now’s a good time to decide.

Make a list of the main elements of your wedding eg indoor/outdoor, type of ceremony and officiant/celebrant, the number of guests, what restrictions you will/won’t accept, venue, date, budget, entertainment, catering, clothing and so on. Next, rank each one as a Must-Have, Nice to Have, or Could Have.

There are so many tempting choices in the world of weddings. It seems like everything is a Must Have, but using this method, you’ll discover the difference. When you have zoned in on your Must Haves, they are everything you really, really want for your wedding day. This clears your mind wonderfully, and your Nice to Haves and Could Haves fall nicely into line.

Make Contingency Plans A, Plan B, and even Plan C

Your first choice and favourite wedding plan is your Plan A. It has all your Must Haves and a good selection of your Nice to Haves. The Could Haves will also be making an appearance.

Let’s hope you get your Plan A, but be ready with a killer Plan B – and possibly even a bonus Plan C. These will give you peace of mind, and options.

Please note: if this sounds difficult or worrying, remember that British people are naturally very good at this. We have an all-scenarios-covered checklist just to go to the beach. So, whether you’re British, or are marrying here, you’re covered. Don’t worry.

You can develop your Plans A, B, C as a written-out scenario. For example: Plan A is that we get married outdoors in the Mystic Hollow, in September with 100 guests. There will be no restrictions on numbers, catering and dancing. Plan B is we get married in Swish House, in December with 50 guests and a socially distanced dinner and no dancing. Plan C, we switch back to Mystic Hollow in September the following year, with our original plan for 100 guests. You could write each element of your wedding on a flashcard and lay them out in different combinations. Colour code your Must Haves – do whatever makes sense to you.

You may discover that no plan is absolutely perfect. Wedding planning in a pandemic is probably going to throw a couple of things off course. The main thing is your Must Haves. Do you still have them?

With a good slug of flexibility and good humour, you’ll get there. In the end, your biggest and best Must Have is your partner. You WILL get married, even if it’s not exactly following your Plan A. Keep looking for the unexpected silver linings that changes bring. I know how cheesy that sounds but it’s true.

On a practical note, if you’d like more information on celebrant weddings, and how they can complement your legal wedding, and what’s the difference, check out my Frequently Asked Questions

The latest info on legal weddings

If you’re looking for the latest info on legal weddings in Dorset, Devon and Somerset from the respective Registration Services, check out these links.

Dorset

Devon

Somerset

Keep talking to people, and reach out for support and advice. Just don’t get like this ….!

If you need any help or a friendly chat, I’ll be in my virtual wedding waiting room.

Contact me

The post Wedding planning in a pandemic appeared first on Beautiful Day Celebrant.

My tips for a memorable, successful outdoor ceremony

In time-honoured blog fashion, I have 10 tips up my sleeve, and they apply to all kinds of ceremony. I’m interested in beautiful, practical and personal ceremonies, which skip neatly around most of the most common pitfalls.

1. The UK weather. Enough said. You and your guests are planning to look your best, so don’t let the weather ruin it. Having a Plan B is essential. Fortunately, we’re very good at this in the UK.  Too hot, too cold, too wet, too windy are all things that happen. Wet weather is best dealt with by going under cover. Umbrellas work up to a point but only when the rain comes straight down, and even then you’ll have a soggy lap – not a good look. On a hot day, it only takes a few minutes sitting on a plastic chair to feel uncomfortable. So seek out natural shade, rig up an awning, hire a gazebo, or a marquee. Offer water, paper fans, white umbrellas and suncream. For the odd shower, white or clear umbrellas look nicer than a mismatch of wonky, patterned and  branded brollies.

2. Are they sitting comfortably? This question is just as much about focus and concentration. We all relax better when we’re sitting down. Also, it’s good to consider the needs of the older generation and families with young children. People tend to overestimate how long they’ll be comfortable standing. I reckon 20 minutes – tops. Arrange your seating in a warm, friendly curve, so everyone can see each other.

3. Create a backdrop. Again, Nature often provides a stunning solution. If you’re having a photographer, she/he will make a bee-line for a good backdrop. You can also create a beautiful focal point with flowers, awnings, archways, or just the view into the distance. I wrote a blog all about that, if you need some inspiration.

4. Think about the light. Most photographers prefer the light earlier or later in the day. It’s not only more flattering, but the noon sun can be unforgiving. The general tendency in life is to have a ceremony, followed by a feast, so if you’re offering lunch, I would start the ceremony at 11.30am. Sunset ceremonies are also lovely.

5. Theme it. Even a simple colour theme brings a ceremony together visually. Looking deeper, how do you want your guests to feel and remember about the occasion. Will your day be playful, joyous, serious or reflective?  If you want an relaxed, romantic atmosphere – what will you choose for the colours, sights, smells, tastes and sounds?

6. Manage background noise. When the stage is all set for a romantic declaration of love and someone decides that THIS is the perfect time to rev up the chainsaw or mow the lawn, it does breaks the spell. If you’re at a hotel venue, that’s less of a problem. If you’re using your own garden, have a friendly word with the neighbours.

7. Can everybody hear me?! Forget the chainsaw, even Nature can be surprisingly noisy and if you have seagulls (we have lots of seagulls in Dorset), or even just a windy day, you can lose sound very easily. A simple microphone and speaker may be needed.

8. Music makes a ceremony. The right choice of music really brings a ceremony to life and helps create the atmosphere you’re after. Live musicians are always wonderful. If you’re using recorded music, check your system and then check it again. It’s incredible how something that works perfectly in one setting, refuses to in another. If you’re paranoid like me, have a back-up,  preferably with lovely wires.

9. Have a clear beginning and end to your ceremony. It can be slightly more challenging to round up guests for outdoor ceremonies. Have a ceremony sheet or at least clear instructions that We’re Starting Now and Time For Champagne, and so on. At the end, you want to keep the momentum and not have confused people drifting off into the middle distance. Rounding people up and keeping them in the right place for the ceremony is also part of my job as a celebrant.

10. Put your heart into it. This is a bit of a cheat but it’s as true of an outdoor ceremony as an indoor one. A ceremony is only as good as the words that are used: beautiful, heartfelt words that capture your thoughts and feelings. The real magic comes when a ceremony is a true expression of you. This takes time, thought, experience and an excellent celebrant (lol). Words and I have been best friends for a very long time.

If you have an occasion in mind, think about how a bespoke ceremony could lift it from being a special day to an extraordinarily wonderful, brilliant day! If I can help you, I’d love to x.

The post Make your outdoor ceremony a big success appeared first on Beautiful Day Celebrant.